riding on...

I am beyond proud of what my dad has just taken part of over the last 2 weeks.  He rode over 700 miles from Kansas to Georgia in just over a week.  Yes rode...a bicycle.  Crazy right?  He was part of a team of other bikers riding to gain awareness and support for, and to provide hope to, those effected by the horrific tornadoes in the Midwest back in May.  Devastation is still a reality in the every day lives of these people and they need the hope of the Lord desperately to carry on each day.  Check it out and be inspired...

Present: Hope from Sulva Productions on Vimeo.

remberance

Sometimes I have a hard time seeing the necessity or significance in looking back to events in the past.  I guess the urgency of the present overshadows the past for me.  There are some things I naturally look back on, but for the most part I'm a "move ahead'  kind of girl.  I know this can't be right though.  There is so much that we can learn form the past experiences in others lives' as well as our own.  I was reminded at church today that God often called His people to remember.  To remember the things He had brought them through, and the way He displayed His faithfulness over the ages.  This video made me realize that remembering is significant and important because it gives purpose, brings gratitude, strengthens community, provides prospective, and reignites hope.  And most importantly, looking back is a  reminder of God's faithfulness to us.

linkin' up with katie here...

grace...

Amy and Skyla June

I am beyond blessed to have such an amazing sister...beyond blessed to have her live only 20 minutes from me...beyond blessed to spend many mornings talking, sipping coffee, and watching all our girlies play...beyond blessed to share the journey of motherhood with her.  She recently posted this on her blog (which you must check out) and I had to share it with you...

After reading and seeing various quotes and blogs from my mommy friends on the book Give them Grace by Elyse Fitzpatrick and Jessica Thompson, I decided to read it myself and see what it was all about. Just the fact that a mother and a daughter wrote a book about parenting together grabbed my attention from the start. This happened about the same time I had my second daughter, so I was somewhat (ok all the way) sleep deprived, and at somewhat (ok all the way) at a loss of how to love two children at the same time with patience and grace.

With both of these things going on, I was blown away. There were definitely points that I was floored and humbled as a mom. First, floored that God in His graciousness has even allowed me to be a mom, and second humbled that I had been thinking I knew what I was doing as that mom. And then I started to notice my language and attitude in the way I parent.

So much of the way I talk is “I, I,I” and the way I talk to my daughters is “you, you , you”. This is where I started to slowly (and continue to very slowly) realize what grace is and is not. Grace is a free gift from God (Eph 2:8). Free, as in no cost. There is nothing I can do as a mom that is “good” There is nothing that my little girls can do that is “good” (Rom 3:12). That is without Jesus.

This is liberating news as a mom, and freeing news as a child. Fitzpatrick says in her book, “The good news of God’s grace is meant to permeate and transform every relationship we have, including our relationship with our children. All the typical ways we construct to get things done and get others to do our bidding are simply obliterated by a gospel message that tells us that we are all both radically sinful and radically loved. At the deepest level of what we do as parents, we should hear the heartbeat of a loving, grace giving Father who freely adopts rebels and transforms them into loving sons and daughters.”

This is the message that my children need to hear from me daily, not the message that if they dont do “good” i will be disappointed with them. I want my children to care far more about what God thinks, than what I think (1 Cor 10:31). I don’t want my children to “behave” just to make me happy. I don’t want my children to have the idea that they are chalking up points with me, or God.

In our home, Adina (our almost 4 year old) has been memorizing the 10 commandments. And while it is very cute that she knows them all and can recite them when asked, what we want her to know more than just what the laws are is that none of us obey them perfectly (Js 2:10), ever, except Jesus (2 Cor 5:21; 1 Pet 1:22). And even though we will never obey them perfectly, Jesus still loves us.

Fitzpatrick says, “Even though our children cannot and will not obey God’s law, we need to teach it to them again and again. And when they tell us that they cant love God or others this way, we are not to argue with them. We are to agree with them and tell them of their need for a Savior.” 
 
It is a popular idea in our culture that children just need to have good self esteem. That little girls are princesses and little boys are warriors and need to be told all the time that they are “good” little girls and boys. Children long to be told that they were good during the day, or as my daughter puts it when she is about to be disciplined “I promise Ill be a good girl”.

Really, Christ is the only good one. Our children are not innately good (Ps 51:5; Eph 2:3). And telling them they are over and over again only reaffirms that they don’t really have a need for grace. Children are not good, but they are loved. If they truly start to believe this, Jesus’ love and grace will start to change their little hearts. With Jesus grace and love as the basis of a child's motivation, the actions are so much sweeter.
In our home we have started to back off from the “good” language and encourage our daughter to rely on Jesus to help her. It is really amazing what happens. Just simple things like, “Jesus is helping you to be so loving to your sister today” to “I think you should pray and ask Jesus to give you more patience with your mommy.”

There is Something about even a 3 year old positioning herself to prayer that softens her heart almost instantly (sometimes are harder than others, of course) and enables her to have a different and more loving outlook on whatever the situation at hand may be. Talking a lot about grace starts to foster a place where a child can be honest in dealing with their heart and be open to letting Jesus help them. And this is where our children can start to get a glimpse of what God’s grace is.

There are day to day things that our children need, like sleep, food, care, protection, and of course some rules set up to create an atmosphere where these things can take place. But what they need most of all is the gospel of grace.

What they need most of all is the gospel of grace.

Some parents may think that parenting with grace is just a different way of saying that you are giving your child a free pass to figure things out on their own and hopefully that will be Jesus in the end. But really, parenting by grace is just the opposite.

Fitzpatrick writes, “Giving grace to children is an exercise of faith and faith is always more difficult than works. It flows out of humility, a character trait that none of us comes by naturally. That's why most people miss it and why works, not faith, is the stumbling block at the cross. You are not slacking off when you tell them of his dazzling love. You are doing the hardest thing.”

My encouragement to you who are parents, and you who are going to be someday is to excite your children about the cross of Christ. Talk about Jesus a lot in your home. Encourage your children to run to Jesus and receive His grace when they may be flourishing and when they may be failing. And the amazing thing about all of this is that as a parent, we get to be amazed as well. Because God’s grace never runs up. There is more than enough for our babies and for us.

Depending on Him

When I read something like this, I realize that if God wants us to depend on Him when it comes to raising our children, it should be no surprise that we encounter challenging situations where we have no resources of our own.  He desires to draw us close to Himself and to deepen our reliance on, and trust in Him.  And it is most often the challenges in life that accomplish these goals in our lives.  And quite honestly, my kids are my biggest challenge most of the time.  So when as the challenges arise (from the minute my eyes open in the morning, and on through the day-and night!), I need to see them as opportunities for me to rely more completely on the Lord.  Opportunities to turn to Him first, instead of a parenting book or a friend's advice.  To receive from Him the resources I really need...wisdom...guidance...patience...gentleness...self control...love.

Eleven

The oldest picture I had on my computer 

April 2004

2 weeks in Hawaii, no kids, ahhhhhhh, the good old days right?

This week will mark 11 yeas of wedded bliss for Brett and me.  Eleven years ago we promised to love each other forever, no matter what.  We are so thankful that the God we promised our faithfulness to, has been faithful to us, in filling us with love for each other every single day.   And I have to say, thanks to Him, we have an amazing marriage.

I've been reading God's Priorities for Today's Woman, a study on Titus 2:3-5, and let me say it has been kicking my butt.  In so may areas of my life.  But, I wanted to share some of the things I've been challenged with in the area of loving my husband.  Because even after 1 1years, I've still got some major growing to do in that area.   Here goes...

"Loving your husband biblically is not always convenient or easy for you; in fact it always requires sacrifice." Ouch!  Am I willing to sacrifice? I know my kids require me to sacrifice, but my husband too?

"By faithfully making your husband a priority, you bring God glory."

It is my purpose in life to bring God glory, and if that is accomplished by loving my husband, that is what I must do. 

Eight practical ways to make your husband a priority:

1.  Think about him- Your heart follows what your mind dwells on.

2.  Do his stuff first- He will be blessed when he sees you putting his stuff at the top of your to-do list.

3.  Maintain an identity as a couple-Spend time together, just the two of you.  Husbands thrive on their wives' undistracted attention.

4.  Look forward to his homecoming- Prepare yourself, your kids and your home for your husbands arrival.

5.  Be at home when he is home-  Take care of your errands while he is at work so you can spend time together as a family.

6.  Pray for him-  There is nothing like praying for someone to motivate us to put our love into action.

7.  Make your relationship with your husband a priority over the other friendships you have- Make your husband your best earthly friend.

8.  From the first year of your marriage to the sixty-first year, plan on and look forward to times of intimacy with your husband- Nothing communicates priority more to a man than this wife's eagerness and willingness to meet his needs in this way.  You are the only person on earth who can do this for him.  And God has given you this special privilege to joyfully obey.

Let the wife see that she 

respects 

and 

reverences her husband- 

that she 

notices him, 

regards him, 

honors him, 

prefers him, 

venerates 

and 

esteems him, 

that she defers to him, 

praises him, 

and 

loves 

and 

admires him 

exceedingly.

Ephesians 5:33 (Amplified Bible) 

Now you know what I mean about kicking my butt right?  

Linkin' up with Katie...check it out!

his handiwork

a summer evening stroll

on a riverside path 

searching out wild blackberries

chasing fireflies

carrying sleeping babies

and

soaking in the amazing handiwork of our God 

 

 a tightly clenched ball of tangled buds

with the potential 

to become 

something beautiful

in time.

Be still and know that I am God 

Psalm 46:1

 linkin' up with Katie here

soul love

 I recently came across "The Duties of Parents" by J.C. Ryle.  Its a pretty old piece (I think from the 1800's), and pretty heady, but has some serious parenting gems in it.  He focuses on the verse, "Train up a child in the way he should go; and when he is old, he will not depart from it."—Prov 22:6, and gives 17 practical ways we can apply this verse in training our children.  This one, number four, really challenged me this week.  If you're like me, it may take at least two readings to let it all sink in, and for you skimmers out there, I underlined the best stuff for you.

Train with this thought continually before your eyes — that the soul of your child is the first thing to be considered.
    Precious, no doubt, are these little ones in your eyes; but if you love them, think often of their souls.  No interest should weigh with you so much as their eternal interests.  No part of them should be so dear to you as that part which will never die. The world, with all its glory, shall pass away; the hills shall melt; the heavens shall be wrapped together as a scroll; the sun shall cease to shine.  But the spirit which dwells in those little creatures, whom you love so well, shall outlive them all, and whether in happiness or misery (to speak as a man) will depend on you.
    This is the thought that should be uppermost on your mind in all you do for your children.  In every step you take about them, in every plan, and scheme, and arrangement that concerns them, do not leave out that mighty question, "How will this affect their souls?"
    Soul love is the soul of all love.  To pet and pamper and indulge your child, as if this world was all he had to look to, and this life the only season for happiness — to do this is not true love, but cruelty.  It is treating him like some beast of the earth, which has but one world to look to, and nothing after death.  It is hiding from him that grand truth, which he ought to be made to learn from his very infancy, — that the chief end of his life is the salvation of his soul.
    A true Christian must be no slave to fashion, if he would train his child for heaven.  He must not be content to do things merely because they are the custom of the world; to teach them and instruct them in certain ways, merely because it is usual; to allow them to read books of a questionable sort, merely because everybody else reads them; to let them form habits of a doubtful tendency, merely because they are the habits of the day.  He must train with an eye to his children’s souls.  He must not be ashamed to hear his training called singular and strange.  What if it is? The time is short, — the fashion of this world passeth away.  He that has trained his children for heaven, rather than for earth, — for God, rather than for man, — he is the parent that will be called wise at last. 

linkin' up with katie...

every story whispers his name...

I grew up going to church at least once a week.  On top of that, I attended a christian school from preschool through college.  So from Sunday school through Old Testament 101, I've been very exposed to the basic Bible stories.  Creation, Noah's ark, Abraham, Joseph, Moses, David, Jonah ... I heard them dozens of times and knew them all.  But it was just a few months ago, as an adult reading the same stories to my girls out of this book, that I was able to see all of these familiar stories through a new lens, the lens of Jesus.  Read the intro to the Jesus Storybook Bible for yourself to get an idea about what I'm talking about.

Here's an excerpt from the story of Joseph.  I always thought it was just about Joseph and his brothers.  How he had a heart of forgiveness.  I never realized it was painting a picture of Jesus himself.  The true "forgiving prince" who would forgive the sins of the whole world.

I was amazed at the way each story touched my heart.  I only pray it has the same effect on the little ones I read it to and that they learn at a young age how much God loves them and has made a way to rescue them too.

Linkin' up with Katie here...